Josh Plovanic's Writings and Thoughts

Uncertainty           Uncertainty, in its broadest definition, is the inability to be aware of, to know, or predict all the complexities of reality, ranging from its origin, its purposes, or the progression of events and occurrences within it. Uncertainty is one of the most prevalent, if not one of the most important, components of our existence. Uncertainty is everywhere. It is in politics. It is in economics. It is in Religion. It is in physics. It is in every major field of study and activity. It is wired in to the fabric of space and time itself, and the actions and behavior of all matter and energy, including life. With every decision we make, we must account for the uncertainty of the progression and outcome of the choice, for positive or for negative. Conscious beings have a respective field of awareness that is present in their waking conscious state. We are aware of our surroundings, the environment we are in, potential threats, potential utilities, and the light and soun

I have had a recurring dream and memory of said dream that has been running through my mind recently. It is pretty simple, but has had a profound impact on my relationship with God. The first time I had this dream I was in a particularly dark place in my life. Without going into that timeframe, this dream was very powerful. I was in a small rectangular column supported building that gave the distinct impression of a temple you would see in the ancient world. It was not contained from the elements. There were no walls, only beautiful white greek-like columns on all sides. In this temple there were 3 or 4 people near the front of the temple, and I got a distinct impression that one of them was God. They were talking very seriously, but I could not make out any words, but when you peered outside in between the collumns, it was as dark as a moonless night, but in the darkness, you caught a glimpse of a ferocious-looking lion baring its teeth. It's eyes were bloodshot with what looked l

Patience for the anxious: You are going to be just fine, Everything works out in time, I know that what you fear, Is losing what you hold dear, Waiting is the hardest part,  For fear to leave and hope to start, They say good things come to those who wait, But you can do your part to abate,  The jitters, the shakes, your rapid breath, By knowing that it will not be your death, Your relief comes when you realize, That your friends & loved ones can't disguise, The love and hope that they will give,  So you can be free to laugh and live, The strength you get when your faith is placed In God and friends, their is no disgrace,  In reaching out to them when, worry rears its ugly face again.

Choice You can turn left or you can turn right.  You can throw the first punch or you can walk away from the fight. Consequences are inescapable and varied, Some quite pleasant and some quite scary, It could be working hard and accruing wealth Or being imprisoned and feeling sorry for yourself.  Whatever you say and whatever you do,  The result of your choice is what the world provides for you. Though it is true, your choices are shaped,  And moldened by the mysteries of fate.  You may have a choice between eating and sleeping, between fighting and fleeing, between silence or speaking,  But the likelihood of choosing the choice that you choose, Depends on the factors present, like your mood Or whether or not the threat is too strong to beat Or whether silence prevents you from speaking deceit Things you don't control lead you to choose, The best of your options so you don't lose Or further your interests and goals you try to achieve. The essence of choice is probability.

The Thief: Steal, Kill, Destroy The Blackest of acts They hamper love and joy Through these our hopes attacked What is it to you? That death and loss saturate this place You see the dreams of countless Assaulted and disgraced O thief, can you not see? You do the opposite of God The price you pay is brutal For you, No sparing of the rod For no grace can come from darkness No mercy from the night No truth can come from absence No sin can stand the light For the nature of God is giving Not the theft of what is Loved The Love of God is healing Not the sword or shedding of blood For the Glory of God is demonstrated By great acts of creation It surely can't be overstated That it's not through devastation O thief and cowardly foe! Tormentor of the flock! Do you not surely know? That you cannot break the lock, For it is sealed by Glory and Grace Stealing, killing, destroying While not get you to the place Where Giving,

I thought my thoughts would liberate me. Boy, was I mistaken. Instead of liberty, My thoughts imprisoned me. My hopes subdued and taken. I was told my ideas could change the world And shape great hopes and dreams. Instead I discovered, Those words I had suffered, Were part of a cruel scheme I found out a cynic's dismal truth Soaked and saturated in lies I came to believe, The fantasies they weave, Were part of their great disguise These demons and bastards in shadows The memories inside my mind Torment me tonight As they do every night, And return my disdain in kind. I think that sleep will relieve me. And put these monsters out of sight They taunt and pervade Relentlessly degrade I am always in for a fight I thought my thoughts would free me. Instead I find only despair They float in my head As I lay in my bed Wishing I could no longer care.

Tears of Joy: Warm wet drops roll down from your eyes. It is not the common tears that you usually cry. For once....oh, for once, happiness has caused The weight to be lifted, and the sorrow to pause. For in this moment before you, you feel and you see, The culumnation of the trial of which you longed to be free. Before your eyes you witness the flash of sorrows and failures, the long nights of cold sweats and terrors in your dreams.  The sobbings. The screaming. The tearing at the seams.  You remember the weight on your back, on your shoulders, and on your mind.  These flashes and memories, you put them behind.  Because now you have love and peace in your story. Hot tears of joy in this moment of glory. Sorrow has left you! It's time to rejoice! A victory in your trial raises the pitch of your voice. As you cry out to heaven, giving thanks and shouting praise.  You're tougher, you're smarter, you're stronger this phase. You can handle

The Angels Amongst Us: There are angels amongst us. I am certain of this. They are present in our danger. They are present in our bliss. When a kind and gentle stranger, Helps you when you are in need. Or a hero in plain clothing Putting pressure where you bleed. They are everywhere, I tell you. Giving strength and giving love. They are agents of truth and light Sent from God way up above. They appear in different forms. They are not all as they seem. They may look like you or me. Or like something from a dream. They can act through anyone. They can help with anything. They will fight your battles with you. And great victory they will bring. With victory comes a peace, That's above all comprehension These angels are amongst us In this life of fear and tension. All is needed is a whisper Or a shout of hope and prayer These angels surely hear us. They are surely everywhere.